Leaving survival mode
My hand too lol. But... I jest, to deflect. It feels... scary, to think about leaving survival mode. It's been like staying under a blanket, comforting me. it's hard to explain. Survival mode was a defense mechanism. It was a wall, protecting me. It's been there through literally all of coming out as trans. Here, read about the deeper details in my Survival mode ends page. All of the pain has been poured onto that page, and I don't want to bring it up again. That page, in combination with the three signs, has been an incredibly cleansing, freeing process and feeling.
The three signs:
Sign 1: Purchasing of the Chessex Rainbow Green Peridot dice set (February 16, 2026)
Sign 2: Purchasing of the Pokemon Pikachu 2 GS (May 5, 2026)
Sign 3: Purchasing of the Nintendo Gameboy (July 25, 2026)
Just... a simple Gameboy, the old grey brick handheld with a black and green display. That's what finally cracked the shell, what finished breaking my mind free of that state. And it's a glorious Gameboy, not a single line on the screen, crystal clear speaker, a few minor scuffs on the back of course. It's my new baby, my Metroid II player.
And that was really the motivation for picking an original Gameboy as sign 3. It's fun, it's frivolous, and it's a bite out of the wallet, implying that one is actually capable of being taken again. Aside from those three signs (and a few relatively minor others, see the Blame! manga series in the Kabucam gallery), I... can't remember spending money on a 'thing'. I remember having 10 inch subs in my car once. I... don't even know otherwise. I lost the majority of my belongings in the middle of survival mode when I became homeless for a period, I remember having a big TV and a Playstation once.
But enough of that. Life has progressed, time has gone by, and survival mode has been exited. It feels good. It feels like I can stop re-using floss. Heck, I bought a dehydrator the other day to make pemmican (and banana chips!)
Life has been getting better, and I'm slowly beginning to wake up to it. At long last.
Kabutroid
-
I am leaving survival mode. I almost want to cry.
Awww.
It's been around me, like a warm blanket, for over 10 years now. December 28, 2015 to July 25, 2026. I barely know how to... process this. But the back of my mind has been busy, and it feels like a cleansing wash over me.
Making this Real Zebeth comic, making the "survival mode ends" page, all of it has been cleaning away a decade of desperation and hopelessness. My arm-claw things were literally shaking when I held and turned on the Gameboy.
They were, it was kinda dangerous.
The third sign of leaving survival mode, a simple original Nintendo Gameboy, has been purchased, has arrived, and has played Metroid II: Return of Samus. At long, long, long last, survival mode ends.
Finally!
Most sprites are property of Nintendo, who are awesome and and amazing and stuff, and also this is a parody and also it's free and stuff.
Comics, ideas, Kabutroid, and other custom content owned by KatieLynne Jackson. I'm pretty easygoing, and really don't mind all that much if you make content based on my content and stuff. Just don't go impersonating me and we're cool.
